This post includes direct quotations from my journal. I have made some minor edits to grammar and style and omitted some personal details. Please be aware that this contains upsetting information (COVID-19 and mentions of the Holocaust) and features my somewhat crass sense of humor.
April 3, 2020
Hello. I’ve been writing occasionally on my laptop again, but otherwise, I’ve been avoiding it, cause it requires me to think about reality.
I read the news this morning. Deaths continue to grow exponentially. 3000 in France now. 4000 in Italy? Maybe more. Over 1000 in just NYC. It’s a lot. And the response, while perhaps too limited at first (definitely because of Trump), is similarly large. Apparently 1/2 of the global population is now under quarantine, or lock-down, or “Shelter in Place” orders. In Northampton County where I live, a stay at home order was put in place around 3/25, so we’re only supposed to leave the house for life-sustaining necessities, though we can still go out for socially distanced, passive recreation.
None of this is that new. But it’s only just sinking in for me that this is a Big Problem. And a long-term problem. I’ll probably be stuck at home until early June, if not longer. And I’m not personally or emotionally prepared for any of it. I want to help people. I want to do well in school. I want to stay sane. I want to keep in touch with friends. And I don’t totally know how to do any of that, or balance it?
Basically, I need to transition from my break plan into my spring term plan, while also dealing with the whole “global pandemic” thing.
April 8, 2020
I am currently at the park and it’s just about sunset. There were three cars in the lot when I arrived, which is more than the usual zero, but the woods are big enough and the trails wide enough that it’s quite easy to maintain the mandated 6 feet of “social distancing.” Social distancing is definitely the catchphrase of these times.
I should note that all my thoughts are tinged by my extensive research (over Carleton’s winter term) of the Warsaw ghetto. While the value of comparing our times to the Holocaust or WWII is dubious, I am not the only one doing it. Especially older folks at church, who were young teens during WWII, have noted that this sense of total disruption and mass domestic mobilization (toward sewing masks, for example) reminds them of the U.S. during WWII. A few additional parallels:
Fear and uncertainty: Those who wrote diaries in the Warsaw ghetto describe a lack of accurate information about the Holocaust. Information was shared through rumor, and Jews in the ghetto accepted the reality of the situation to varying degrees. Now, we have an oversaturation of information, especially due to the global connectivity provided by the internet. This allows many people across the world to share their personal stories on a mass scale, independent of government intervention. However, it can also create echo chambers or worse, two completely different narratives of reality both claiming verity (I am thinking of my own family and the contrasts between my conservative dad and liberal mom).
Deaths: News articles and politicians have drawn connections to Pearl Harbor and D-Day. I am not sure about this. There are different causes, a smaller scale, and a different at-risk population. For the United States, most WWII deaths were soldiers, who were young to middle-aged men. This being said, victims of the Holocaust included many women, elderly people, and the sick because young healthy men were valuable to the Nazis because they could perform labor.
Hope and humanity: In moments like this, I think that it is revealed that most people are good, humans are powerfully empathetic, and that hope can survive. There are so many examples of this, but what I would like to note now is a commitment to aesthetics. People are planting flowers, cleaning their homes, posting pleasant things online, doing DIY projects, and putting up unseasonal Christmas lights. This may seem trivial, but it matters. For example, even in the Warsaw ghetto, people took time to plant flowers, herbs, and veggies in their window boxes, to bring beauty and normalcy back into the cramped city blocks. I see this same instinct, this same need to create beauty in a dark world playing out in the tacky Easter decorations, gardens, and lights in my Pennsylvania suburb.
End of quotation. I understand that comparing COVID-19 to the Holocaust is flawed/problematic, but because I took a 300-level on The Holocaust this winter, that is where my mind is stuck. I am still journaling frequently and will post a similar installment next Sunday. I am open to feedback and suggestions!
